Comments on Profile Post by Poryg

  1. Poryg
    Poryg
    For someone who always needs to do something it's a torture to not do anything. Lying around in a crippled state was no life for him. He always needed to be self sufficient. So the more he was in that state, the more torture it was for him. Yet it's pointless to explain that :(
    Dec 21, 2018
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  2. Finnuval
    Finnuval
    I agree that those kind of condolences are unwelcome
    Dec 21, 2018
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  3. Sharm
    Sharm
    I always thought of people saying "my condolences" meant "I'm sorry that life is hard and that you're going through something tough, and I hate that I can't do anything other than stand by you in solidarity."
    Dec 21, 2018
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  4. Sharm
    Sharm
    On that note, I'm glad that he's free of pain and that you can move forward, I'm sorry for you having to lose him to something like that, and I wish people all died peacefully and painlessly at the end of a long life so no one had to deal with this.
    Dec 21, 2018
    Marsigne likes this.
  5. Poryg
    Poryg
    If it hadn't been only 140 chars, I'd explain it better. I hate condolences, because oftentimes people say what they think... But oftentimes is just wrong. I have heard a couple of times that it was a pity it was so quick... When it was no pity, but his choice and it was something that suited his character.
    Dec 21, 2018
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  6. Poryg
    Poryg
    Me being that guy who speaks his mind, I always correct them, even though it always sounds crude. But regardless of how it sounds, I always feel the need to set it straight. Because it was one part of his character I understand as we're the same in that aspect.
    Dec 21, 2018
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  7. samkfj
    samkfj
    When my dad passed--people would tell me "Oh he's in a better place now."

    My response was "No--his place is here."
    Dec 21, 2018
  8. Philosophus Vagus
    Philosophus Vagus
    People say some stupid sheep in those situations...at the same time though many people feel compelled to say something, because silence feels callous to them. I feel the same way you do but after dealing with it several times I've just accepted that and that most of them are trying to genuinely sympathize, they just don't know what to say so end up saying whatever platitude first comes to mind.
    Dec 21, 2018
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  9. Philosophus Vagus
    Philosophus Vagus
    Which can be disheartening and even feel callous in and of itself but I do think it's important to remember that's not what they are trying to convey and that most people just don't know what to do in those situations but feel compelled to offer something. Those of us who prefer silence to banal thoughts are rare, and in those situations the awkwardness of silence seems to bother them more than is routine.
    Dec 21, 2018
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  10. Marsigne
    Marsigne
    I agree with @Philosophus Vagus , though I personally think they should know the dead's relatives better. It's tragic to them after all.
    Dec 21, 2018