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mishakoc
mishakoc
When I was trying to catch a bus, lol.
Lemonrice
Lemonrice
Oh no, hopefully nothing beside the backpack broke
mishakoc
mishakoc
Fortunately not. Seems like the books cushioned the fall, so the (brand new) laptop isn't even scratched. I'm lucky even when I'm unlucky.
BlueMage
BlueMage
Or the symptom just hasn't showed up yet, laptop is the most vulnerable thing in the world, i tell you
The Stranger
The Stranger
Why are you carrying around 20 books and a laptop? That seems like a lot of stuff to be carrying around. Not sure what your money situation is like, but it might be a good idea to get a proper laptop bag. I'd send you mine if I could; I don't use it anymore. lol.
mishakoc
mishakoc
@BlueMage You might be right. Hopefully, it didn't do any damage but I'll see how it turns out.
mishakoc
mishakoc
@The Stranger Yeah, looking back at it, it was really foolish of me.
I was going to the school library to return the books I borrowed to read during the summer. I planned to bring them in batches as not to have this many books at once, but being me, I forgot. Today was the last day to return them without having to pay a fine.
mishakoc
mishakoc
Buying a laptop bag is not a bad idea, but I hate shoulder bags, to be honest. I gave mine away too. I'll try to not pack my backpack so much in the future though.
Thanks for being so nice, I appreciate that. :)
mishakoc
mishakoc
Wish I could be so nice to myself too. My reaction was: Of course you deserved it for acting like an idiot.
The Stranger
The Stranger
@mishakoc You sound like me. lol. I am unforgiving and cruel to myself. Might be wise to not try to stuff 20 books and a laptop into an ordinary bag though. :P Hope your laptop didn't suffer any real damage.
mishakoc
mishakoc
Yeah, what happens to me is shaped by the decisions I make a lot of time, so I'm very critical to myself (not like it helps or anything).
It's easier to be more lenient towards other people because you don't know their lives or circumstances, I think. And you don't spend so much time thinking about their mistakes.
The laptop seems to work fine so far, fingers crossed.
mishakoc
mishakoc
That reminds me of the self-serving bias. "Individuals tend to ascribe success to their own abilities and efforts, but ascribe failure to external factors."
I always thought my successes are a coincidence and luck, while failures are because of my bad qualities. I like to think it is a realistic way to think like that (because it is literally the truth) but maybe I'm just too insecure.
The Stranger
The Stranger
I'm the same. I dislike it when people attempt to absolve me of my role in the bad things that have happened in my life (usually because I was young). I also dislike being praised or complimented for doing things I'm meant to be doing, or which are fairly ordinary.
The Stranger
The Stranger
I know that clinical depression makes the most basic of things far harder than it needs to be, but that doesn't mean I want to be praised for brushing my hair, or getting out of bed. Makes me feel like a child. I know they mean well though. TBH, I struggle to accempt compliments or praise at all, probably because I have no faith in myself.
The Stranger
The Stranger
Life has only ever taught me to expect the worst. Maybe we try to act like such a way of thinking is 'realistic' and has made us strong, but I'm not sure these things are true at all.
Hyouryuu-Na
Hyouryuu-Na
Oof! 20 books and a laptop! I hope the laptop is fine but more importantly- is your back fine? That sounds awfully heavy. I used to carry around 12 and I felt like a corpse at the end of each day.
mishakoc
mishakoc
@The Stranger I can tell you the bad things that happened were never 100% your fault and beating yourself up for it is not healthy at all. But that sounds so hypocritical because even if I know it objectively is the case, my brain is telling me something different when it's about myself.

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I wrote RPGMakerMZ JavaScript reference in Japanese.
But I think you'll be able to read it through the translator.

back in April of 2019, I watched my friend's art stream on twitch. that was when I got inspired to draw most of the assets for my game. it's been a LONG journey since, but totally worth it.
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