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The Stranger

Awwh.

You usually find out who your true friends are when you need them the most. I can only rely on one person to be there for me when I need them, but they're paid to be there. lol.

Ryisunique

I live with one and the others likely feel obligated through blood. If that.

The Stranger

I hope that, one day, you find someone who wants to spend time with you because they want to, not because they feel obligated. I've spent most of my life alone, but I don't feel lonely. I think that I just got used to having no one around that it no longer has an effect on me. I do all the socialising I need on here, or with my support worker. lol.

Ryisunique

That love emote should be different.

For the most part, I'm good. Today however is my 30th and just went 'my life kinda sucks and I wanna fake normalcy for a couple of hours.'

Hyouryuu-Na

While it really is sad that you only got one reply, I think it's possible that some may have not got/read that text? It happens some times that I or my friends are busy and one of us may text the others but nobody actually read it. Or they could have an appointment someplace else. And I hope that's the case because being ignored by friends is very sad TT

standardplayer

Happy Birthday! You don't have to be physically alone on your birthday, I'm outside your home right now, being creepy af. Messin around with your garbage cans, going through em. Learning. Watching. (My point is, sometimes alone is alright. When the other option is me getting into your garbage)

Hyouryuu-Na

Oh and Happy Birthday ^^ Don't give a s*** if you're alone. It's just like any other day and I spend most birthdays alone ^^

The Stranger

lol! Yeah, I'd love for it to just be a lil' heart. The current one sends a different kind of message. xD

Awwh. You've turned 30? I turned 30 in April, and suffered some sort of mini crisis.It hit me that I hadn't done anything I wanted to, that my life sucks, and that I'm still in a very unstable, dark place mentally. Just got to me more than usual when I was reminded that I'm now 30.

The Stranger

I can understand wanting to experience normalcy. It's something I've envied in others, something I've hungered for. I mean, my biggest dream is to father a daughter. That's it. Then I remember that in order to do that I need to find someone willing to have kids with me, and that demands trust, stable income, a stable mind, etc. Such a simple thing feels beyond my reach.

standardplayer

Yeah, I'm about to slide into 32 real soon. It gets better, you're just young compared to 40 now XD @The Stranger I know that feeling, I had the same experience.

The Stranger

@standardplayer I was like 'where the f*ck did my twenties go?' xD I honestly have no memories from my twenties. I remember my late teens, but I don't remember my twenties.

Ryisunique

@Hy

standardplayer

Oh you done messed up and hit enter to autocomplete

Hyouryuu-Na

@The Stranger You miss your twenties? :") I don't want to face it. Next year I'll be 20 and I realize I'll graduate, get a job and get married in that decadd. And Nope I dont want the last one :") I wanna stay a teenager for life TT

The Stranger

@Hyouryuu-Na I don't miss them, I don't remember them. I have no memories of them. All of the eventful things happened in my early life, then nothing of any note happened in my twenties. Well, nothing that formed any long lasting, impactful memories.

Ryisunique

Thank you. @Hyouryuu-Na I posted on FB, but I'm not popular.

@The Stranger I've had a few internal ones. Noticbly after realizing I'm stuck on the early teen phase of life. Out of reach ideas are another area.

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