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Drenz
Drenz
@The Stranger I ain't nothing special, brotha. I just learned over the years that it is my failures that teach me the most. Now a days, I love to fail. Because it just means I'm gonna be that much better when I get up and try it again. You can't dwell on the bad you've been through in the form of a negative, you need to think of it as "How can I learn and grow from this?"
Drenz
Drenz
@The Stranger Then get out there and kick some ass! Haha. You got this, man! Not to mention, I got your back you ever need it! :D
Poryg
Poryg
I'm in no position to be saying that. When I wake up, all I do is struggle to survive. Then sleep... And next day again. I need a break. A rest... But no. No rest. And when it looks like I finally have some breathing room... Boom. Boom. I'm screwed. Once again. Can't say it's undeserved. It's just exhausting.
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starlight dream
starlight dream
For sure failures have taught me what NOT to do again. It's good to know those things :p

Most of my failures are writing/art/work related. So they completely fall upon me. But they were great lessons. And I had fun making those 'mistakes'.^^
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Poryg
Poryg
The times change so fast... It's just too fast for me. I don't know what is going to happen tomorrow, let alone in a year. I just know that whatever does, it's not going to be pleasant. I don't even know how it feels to be happy anymore. I don't have the motivation to be happy either... It's just desperation.
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starlight dream
starlight dream
@Poryg Sorry to hear it's so difficult. Maybe you can talk to your doctor, because you sound unwell :( Is there someone you can talk to about your difficulties, or ask for advice?
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Poryg
Poryg
In fact even my emotions have greatly reduced compared to past. I used to feel so many emotions it was insane. But as time developed... People betrayed me again and again, so I learned to block huge pain. As I progressed, I blocked more and more emotions... And became more blunt in the process. What others need to gather courage for to say, has become a daily bread for me.
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Poryg
Poryg
@starlight dream I've been unwell for last 4 years to be honest. My character is gradually disappearing. I will end up being a bitter old man as I grow old :D It's the way I went on since I was younger... Some people cut themselves to make it easier, I've directly developed emotion blocking mechanisms. Not a good step either :D It's not visible too often, but from time to time I just break down and get depressed.
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Poryg
Poryg
The changes are the most visible in my love life. I used to be quite a romantic. But as I changed, even my love. I've earned an ability to control my feelings of love to a great extent. It's therefore hard to impress me. But when you do, it's up to me as to what I do. And oftentimes I end up pursuing the girl knowing I can't get her... Because I can extract some motivation from it.
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Marsigne
Marsigne
Seems like "Do or do not: There is no try." fits here. :)
Poryg
Poryg
So far I've been amazing in that though. Due to the interest not being mutual I end up with the girl liking my attention, but trampling on my feelings in the end. Fortunately though, I have become resistant to emotional pain... To such an extent that I almost don't feel it. I just break down every once in a while.
Marsigne
Marsigne
I have my methods too, and I think I've been getting better at them over time. Keep improving on it, but watch out for their bites. :p
Poryg
Poryg
It's impossible when you're in the middle of a kiss though, they can bite your tongue.
Marsigne
Marsigne
Seems like you have some fail-check to do.
Poryg
Poryg
Nah, I had a friend with which I've done worse things than just kissing, she just bit my tongue a lot while kissing. And she wasn't too soft about it either :(
Marsigne
Marsigne
Have you asked her to not do so again?
Poryg
Poryg
No point in doing that.
Marsigne
Marsigne
If she's not aware of it, then there's no point in continuing, indeed. But you may want to make sure for your own sake. :)
Poryg
Poryg
She knew I didn't like it, since I punched her once in a shoulder. Too bad she liked pain...
Marsigne
Marsigne
RIP, You have a point. From this point, it seems like specific context is needed, so if you want to have a 2nd ear, you're free to PM me about it and we can figure out more of it together. :kaohi:

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