Children - Love them or Loathe them?

[Alkorri]

Hi there, lovely peoples. Since I don't use Facebook much, I'm curious to hear what any of you think about this particular subject:

Children. Do you love kids? Why? Is it the fuzziness? The cuteness?

Do you fear being around kids? Are you a horrible person if you don't know how to act around them? What if they scream and cry? What if they don't like you?

As you can probably tell, I'm not used to dealing with kids    So I'm curious to hear of people's experiences. I've always been puzzled by my brother's ability to so easily handle children, at how he can open his heart to them that they flock to him as if he had a hidden Pokemon. How does he do it? Just so we're clear, I'm not jealous! Heck, the idea of being swarmed by kids kinda freaks me out...

Okay, so I might have answered my own question ;D

PS, Main reason for asking? I'm going to be a step parent to an utterly sweet seven-year-old boy with Aspergers. We get along well, and my fiancee understands me, but I'm just wondering if my uneasiness around kids was horrible/abnormal.

 

[kerbonklin]

I am a horrible person who doesn't know how to act around them. D:

Probably would be different if it was my own child.

Oh and I dislike children who are stoned/high off terrible new-generation kids shows.

 

[Touchfuzzy]

I don't like kids.

 

[Alkorri]

I don't like kids.

Whoa, surprisingly more of you than I expected. I no longer feel so alone ;D

 

[Dalph]

If I like the little brats?

It depends, if they're well educated and kind, absolutely YES, but if they're in truth nothing more than dirty little monsters...then NO, I don't like them...I still know how to deal with them however.

I have a 9y old sister that is smart, awesome and well educated, plus she also loves RM...ahahah, so I have plenty experience in the matter.

I like how those little creeps are curious, naive and eager to learn something...it's awesome...and let's not be selfish here, we were all brats once.

 

[Alkorri]

I like how those little creeps are curious, naive and eager to learn something...it's awesome...and let's not be selfish here, we were all brats once.

True! I remember calling a lady Fat once, poor dear. I was nine and rightly got punished for it ;D

Your sister sounds awesome - do you create RM games together?

 

[Dalph]

Your sister sounds awesome - do you create RM games together?

Well...she's a Ralph's fangirl in truth (I'm serious)...  

----

She likes to give me feedback sometimes, to not count the fact that she's only 9y but already a better graphic artist than me. She even did some good sketches of her characters and already wrote a good storyline for her own RM game...you women can be so awesome, there is little to do about that...ahahah.

Anyway, I will do my best to help her with her little game soon...

 

[EFizzle]

Lifeguard here, and kids are the devil incarnate. Nothing good comes from children running around...

 

[Yato]

I despise the demons posing as children who live above us. There is no reason you should be throwing an hour-long temper tantrum at 1 am in the morning. Neither should you be running (read: stomping) around either.

 

[Touchfuzzy]

I'll elaborate some.

My dislike of kids has more to do with my own neuroses than anything being wrong with kids. I am a very organized and ordered person, and I dislike chaos, especially LOUD chaos. Kids are loud chaos. It is the one thing that can get me to the end of my rope the fastest.

Kids themselves aren't the issue, its that kids being kids, which I have no illusions there is anything wrong with, is something that drives me insane.

 

[Alkorri]

Lifeguard here, and kids are the devil incarnate. Nothing good comes from children running around...

This should not have made me giggle so loud ;D

Anyway, I will do my best to help her with her little game soon...

D'awwww I think I see your point, it's exciting to see what their creativity comes up with with no restrictions

@Touchfuzzy - Exactly, chaos. It's like you prefer things a certain orderly way and then Bam, for good or worse, a kid lays havoc to your best laid plains!

 

[mlogan]

I don't think there is anything wrong with some people just not being "kid people" so to speak.  Everyone has different aptitudes and abilities, I see this just as another aspect of that.  Personally, I am a kid person and always have been.  Good thing, since I have two of my own, a degree in special education and currently teach kindergarten.

I think in general, one thing that helps to remember is that they are people, plain and simple.  And for everyone there are some people you "click" with right away, as well as others that you don't.  It is no different with kids.  Even being a kid person, there are some kids I have amazing relationships with and others that just leave me scratching my head.  Same with adults.

So just look at your future stepson as a person to get know, just like you would an adult.  Ask him lot's of questions about himself and the things he's interested in, just like you would an adult.  Kids are going to act like the bad stereotype of kids if you treat them that way.  They will (most of the time) act like cool little people who just happen to be a bit shorter if you treat them with dignity and respect.  (Which is not always that easy, says the mom who just lost it on her kiddo.    )

 

[Dalph]

It depends on the kids guys, you can't generalize this way, my sister (and her friends too) for example are very quiet and tidy, and this isn't synonym of chaos by any means.

All depends by the education given by the parents and not by the kids themselves.

 

[Touchfuzzy]

But that is the thing, there is nothing WRONG with kids being loud and exuberant and chaotic, especially in the correct circumstances (and playing in the back yard or playing video games with each other is totally a fine time to be that way). They are KIDS. I don't have an issue with kids being kids, and in all honesty, I'm actually GOOD with kids, I just can't deal with them for very long and don't enjoy it.

Its me that is the problem with me not being able to deal with kids, not them.

 

[mlogan]

It depends on the kids guys, you can't generalize this way, my sister (and her friends too) for example are very quiet and tidy, and this isn't synonym of chaos by any means.

All depends by the education given by the parents and not by the kids themselves.

Completely conflicting statements there.  But I agree partly with both.  Yes, it is partly personality - again they are people, they all have different personalities.  Some are by nature loud, boisterous, active, "crazy", silly people (my eldest daughter).  Others are more quiet, orderly, neat, calm, etc (more like my younger daughter).  So, two kids, two different personalities, same parents.  However, we work to teach them right, how to behave in public, etc.  Do they always "perform" perfectly in public? No.  Are they learning? Yes, and more often than not lately, we've gotten compliments on their behavior in public.  So, it's part personality (nature), part parenting (nurture).

 

[Dalph]

@Touchfuzzy:

I see your point, it takes patience...

@mlogan:

Actually it was my mistake on the first line, I should've said "It depends on the kids education", but the phrase isn't a complete mistake at all, because as you say it can also depend on their personality.

And you're right about everything.

 

[EtphTheElephant]

Hate the little brats to death, they can't be quiet or sit still in one spot.

 

[Alkorri]

So just look at your future stepson as a person to get know, just like you would an adult.  Ask him lot's of questions about himself and the things he's interested in, just like you would an adult.  Kids are going to act like the bad stereotype of kids if you treat them that way.  They will (most of the time) act like cool little people who just happen to be a bit shorter if you treat them with dignity and respect.  (Which is not always that easy, says the mom who just lost it on her kiddo.    )

Good reminder, mlogan That kids are people with different personalities. My future stepson is quite the sweetheart, even if he has such a short attention span (ADD) that it's difficult to hold a conversation. And lord, can he can talk and talk and TALK about video games...

 

[Amysaurus]

Kids? I will stand by my loathing of the little implings to the very end.

I can handle the noise and whining as long as they ultimately follow my iron-fisted commands, but I cannot stand the numerous kids now who don't show any respect for their elders or even each other.

Considering he's not quite 5, I'm a tad more lenient with my younger brother. He wants to be an astronaut-artist so he can paint his own spaceship, loves dinosaurs, and sings songs to me about animals cutting their own heads off. Essentially, he's a tiny me c:

 

[mlogan]

but I cannot stand the numerous kids now who don't show any respect for their elders or even each other.

See, and while they do frustrate me (I know, I have to teach some of them), I feel sorry for them at the same time.  Is it their fault they do not know how to show respect?  They weren't taught, they aren't born knowing.  I feel bad for them that people despise them for something not of their own doing.  It makes me angry at the parents.