Do you think this chapter one is ready to be a complete game?


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LoneWolfDon

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Looking at the things you mention in your previous couple of posts, it looks like you're on the right track in making various improvement to your game. Keep at it, and I'm sure your game will keep getting better and better. Good luck. :)
 

ImmortalDreams

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Updates:

  1. I added interior maps for the rest of Lornly. I did all the eventing for them except Granny's house.
  2. I changed the combat battle skills and turned them into special attacks. To remove the Hit skill confusion, I also re-added the Attack and Guard battle commands.
  3. I added a few tip/tutorial messages to the first part of the game.
  4. I made dashing possible everywhere. (Except for cut scenes, of course.)
  5. For Easier navigation, I removed several rocks from the haunted woods, and I expanded Lornly slightly on the bottom.
  6. The poor living area in Averdene is less grid-like and looks more disheveled.
Even though I haven't created the conversation with Granny yet, I think I'm about overdue to release an updated version of the demo. I'll go ahead and do that soon. Also, someone recently told me my mapping is horrendous. What do you think?
 

Randommerade

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I think your mapping could definitely use some work. But it's fine for your first game (better than mine anyways, lol)

I'm excited about the new interior maps and events. :D
 

ImmortalDreams

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Okay, so I know I haven't been on here in ages. I've been busy with other projects, plus I was depressed about some of the demo's reception, but I think I'm back now. Anyway, I'm writing this post because I really, REALLY need your help with my game. I have some questions, and I would greatly appreciate your participation. Fae Rebirth has many flaws. The mapping is a big one, but so is the flow. Here are the questions/comments.

Question #1: Where do you think the flow of the game is weakest? eg. The story is too fast or under detailed.

Comment: Someone said they thought things moved too fast when Elyn meets Kel. I'd like to expand that. One idea I have for doing that is to add more obstacles and traveling before they get to Lornly. That would add time to stretch out the dialog, story, and character development. That brings me to question two.

Question #2: What obstacles and events do you think would be good to insert in that time frame and possibly others?

Comment: I'm running short on ideas in this area, but I'll try to expand things. Any suggestions would mean a lot to me.

Question #3: Which maps need work, and which ones do you like?

Comment: I've already gotten the impression that table tiles for walls in addition to perfect grids are unaccepted. Also, someone told me they didn't think my forests were structured properly.

Here are some screenshots with numbers. I won't ask you to play the demo for your map opinions.

#1 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img153/1170/17267080.jpg[/IMG]
#2 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img541/7929/98791634.jpg[/IMG]

#3 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img46/3046/74690850.jpg[/IMG]

#4 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img402/8987/96665833.jpg[/IMG]

#5 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img594/2982/68800382.jpg[/IMG]

#6 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img440/5457/aw8n.jpg[/IMG]

#7 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img41/4263/nuhs.jpg[/IMG]

#8 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img38/1610/me0l.jpg[/IMG]

#9 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img826/4866/7cmc.jpg[/IMG]

#10 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img546/9706/27091989.jpg[/IMG]

#11 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img834/2027/28815188.jpg[/IMG]

#12 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img812/3566/83726605.jpg[/IMG]

#13 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img17/5787/42430435.jpg[/IMG]

#14 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img197/4003/d5nn.jpg[/IMG]

#15 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img11/7823/rzul.jpg[/IMG]

#16 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img542/383/vblv.jpg[/IMG]

#17 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img20/9665/rkxm.jpg[/IMG]

#18 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img818/3329/39g3.jpg[/IMG]

#19 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img801/4820/43976562.jpg[/IMG]

#20 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img30/2773/p8np.jpg[/IMG]

#21 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img163/4031/45701196.jpg[/IMG]

#22 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img547/7247/60098587.jpg[/IMG]

#23 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img203/3927/64392538.jpg[/IMG]

#24 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img23/2790/hnzq.jpg[/IMG]

#25 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img5/6116/45622125.jpg[/IMG]

#26 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img42/5624/yaib.jpg[/IMG]

#27 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img850/6104/3kar.jpg[/IMG]

#28 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img833/1774/uot3.jpg[/IMG]

#29 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img855/5926/fnv0.jpg[/IMG]

#30 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img716/3492/1est.jpg[/IMG]

#31 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img12/9666/uruj.jpg[/IMG]

#32 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img822/8051/ggns.jpg[/IMG]

#33 [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img854/2962/4y4a.jpg[/IMG]
Question #4: Are there any other changes that you would like to recommend?

Comment: Your feedback is always welcome.

A million hugs for anyone who answers any of these! I really appreciate all the feedback you've given me so far. Thank you to everyone who has stayed with me and played my demo. It means more to me than I can say.
 
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Dalph

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Never, never, never be depressed! Criticism should only make you stronger!

Criticism and honest feedback is what you need if this is your first project...an harsh but honest critique is still a lot better than a fake praise.

I can't say or suggest anything from here, I have to try the demo first.
 
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ImmortalDreams

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Updates:

  1. I made the map for the first cutscene before the credits less square and more dynamic. I also added a slightly stronger glow effect for the magic symbol on the floor.
  2. I extended the part near the beginning where Elyn meets Kel. There is more forest to traverse, another encounter with soldiers, and a boss battle with an ogre, then more information gets revealed.
  3. I edited those forest maps quite a bit with some great advice from The Stranger. They look much more appealing now. See a comparison below:
Old: [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img541/7929/98791634.jpg[/IMG]New: [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img59/6669/bro0.jpg[/IMG]
Old: [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img703/1881/79638569.jpg[/IMG]New: [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img543/9979/lnrp.jpg[/IMG]
 

ImmortalDreams

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Updates:

  1. I added fog to most of my forest maps. See below.
  2. I revamped some maps, including the forest maps below and the dirt cave beneath them.
Dirt Cave:

[IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img837/5809/wzqy.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img577/1008/e50w.jpg[/IMG]
Haunted Woods:

Old: [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img546/9706/27091989.jpg[/IMG]New: [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img826/555/fpde.jpg[/IMG]
Old: [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img812/3566/83726605.jpg[/IMG]New: [IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img209/3421/mu6y.jpg[/IMG]

EDIT #1:

Updates:

  1. I finished revamping all the forest maps.
  2. I added rivers and bridges to the world maps.
  3. I enhanced the vampire fortress interior maps.
  4. I created a new exterior for Lornly. Could you please tell me what you think about it?
Vampire Fortress:

[IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img809/1128/aot6.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img580/7891/zqzd.jpg[/IMG]

[IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img441/4126/4j90.jpg[/IMG]
Lornly Exterior:

[IMG]http://imageshack.us/a/img837/8458/0owq.jpg[/IMG]
EDIT #2:

Updates:

  1. I gave the interior maps of Lornly a makeover. No more tables for walls!
  2. I decorated the mine entrance map at the end of the game. It looks much more compelling. Sadly, it's such a graphic intensive scene that it can't handle fog. :(
What's left? Not much!

  1. Event some conversations with Granny(a villager of Lornly).
  2. Give the city of Averdene an extreme makeover.
What I need your help with: I'm getting very close to finishing the initial map improvements. That means I will release an updated demo soon. I'm asking you to please try it out and give me your feedback. This game needs your approval before it can be complete. Besides, I really want to start making chapter two. I'm estimating there will be around five chapters depending on how long each stage of the story will take.
 
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ImmortalDreams

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I just added a poll for those of you who have and would like to play the new and improved chapter one demo! Here is the direct download link. Also, I think I'm going to start making a game skeleton for chapter two. It can't hurt to get started, right? It's been almost a year since I started this project, and I want to keep the story moving. Besides, I've been absent for so long, it's about time I got back to work. I get the impression I've lost most of you and your interest in this game series, but I hope some of you will stick with me. I always welcome your feedback even if it's very critical. Please don't give up on me yet. I'm not giving up on you or Fae Rebirth.
 

Dark_Metamorphosis

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Downloading the new file now :) I think the new maps looks nice, I especially like the new atmosphere in the forest!
 

Dark_Metamorphosis

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So I have played the new version for a bit now and thought I could share some stuff so far. Sorry for possible weird English from time to time :/

I like the new layout for the game screen (The screen with New game etc, I lost the word for it ';') I think It's remade right? Cause I can't remember it from the older version.

I still think that you could add a spell for Elyn even at the get go. The first fight with the Ogre is basically getting your ass kicked (when the Ogre crits) while using ordinary attacks with Elyn and the healing spell with Kel until it dies. Since you get the hack spell after a little while It's not much of a deal anyway, but I feel that it would make the starting point a bit more interesting if she had some sort of skill too. Just to spice it up a bit even at the start.

So got to the world map, and I suggest that you use 'Event Touch' or 'Player Touch' for the entry of your locations. I can see why you have put it as

'Action button' but I find it a bit confusing when you have to press it to enter. I would add a textbox saying would you like to enter 'Village'? or something to avoid the player from accidentally enter the location. Same goes for the entrance to the various buildings, I think a 'player touch' would be much smoother.

I really enjoy the music, It's really moody and lovely! Sets the atmosphere just perfectly. Think you have done a great job in picking fiting music for the maps.

I would also suggest to get rid of the shadows in the Interiors. I think they look really weird and indoors location usually dont need any shadows at all.

I think it would look much better if you completely removed them, or added your own shadows with an overlay or something (those squarish autoshadows just look weird when used this way).

Why are there stairs inside the buildings if I can't walk upstairs? Will it be possible to enter the second floor
later on? (Reffering to the Inn) If so, I think you should make an indication that you cant enter at first (Like the Inn-keeper
yelling that It's off-limits or something), and if not I think It's better to just get rid of the stair, since
It's a bit confusing. Noticed that you have done this for the gypsy's house, so it feels a bit inconsistent.

 I would suggest to use a higher frequency on the little boy Jessie. His walking animation looks really weird
(walks, stops, walks, stops etc). If you set the event to the highest on the tab 'Freq', his walking animation
will be a lot smoother.

There's some stairs that leads up to the graveyard place, but I can't enter it. Is this inteded?

No flee command in the battles :( ?

After talking to the Gypsy and recieved the Bronze sword, there's not much of an indication of where to go or
where the party is heading. I think It's great that you dont enforce too much of hand-holding, but I also believe that no
indication what so ever is a bit annoying (Migh be because I'm not a fan of random encounters, and when there's no
flee command It kinda gets on my nerves a bit. So take this criticism with a grain of salt, since Its mostly
the random encounters that makes it a bit annoying for me.) I'm not sure if the old version was like this on this
part as well, I can't remember fully.

So after running around the map for a good 15-20 minutes I still havn't found where I'm supposed to go..?
I ran towards the other town and tried to take the road to the South, then I get my first indication of where
I'm supposed to go (To the mountains in the North). But I can't find anything but a lot of forest to the North,
and the village of Lordly to the NorthEast? Am I just blind here?

So far I think the new version is a lot better, and its very noticable that you have polished up everything!
There are still some small aspects that could be improved upon, but overall I think the new version is a big
improvement so far. Once I find out where the heck I'm supposed to go, I'll try and finish up the rest of the game.

Also, keep in mind that my criticism is my own personal opinion. So don't take it too much to your heart

Edit: Oh, and forgot to say that I'm not giving up on you and the game. I think you have something going here, and as long as you keep working on the game and give it the attention that you feel it needs, I'm sure it will turn out really nice :)
 
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ImmortalDreams

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I fixed a very important bug in the latest version of the demo! If you want to fully experience the game, please download it here! Sorry for the inconvenience!

Thank you for your wonderful response Dark_Metamorphosis. I'll take your advice to heart. I'd like to keep the stars the way they are, though, because on touch entering events are minor and invisible. Stars are for entering towns, cities, and buildings. The graveyard is intended to stay the way it is, but I will add some text for the inn stairs.

When you talk to the gypsy and get the sword, she tells you exactly what you need to do. She's psychic, and she warned you that you need to get through the haunted woods by day break. To do that, you need to talk to Bo Johnson in the tavern(inn). He's the only one who knows the route. When you talk to some other characters they give you similar hints about what you need to do.
 
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Dark_Metamorphosis

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I fixed a very important bug in the latest version of the demo! If you want to fully experience the game, please download it here! Sorry for the inconvenience!

Thank you for your wonderful response Dark_Metamorphosis. I'll take your advice to heart. I'd like to keep the stars the way they are, though, because on touch entering events are minor and invisible. Stars are for entering towns, cities, and buildings. The graveyard is intended to stay the way it is, but I will add some text for the inn stairs.

When you talk to the gypsy and get the sword, she tells you exactly what you need to do. She's psychic, and she warned you that you need to get through the haunted woods by day break. To do that, you need to talk to Bo Johnson in the tavern(inn). He's the only one who knows the route. When you talk to some other characters they give you similar hints about what you need to do.
I see :) I'm not sure what you mean with touch entering events being minor and invisible though?  You can still use the animated stars to show even if the event will trigger on touch. I use it like this for entering towns as well in my own game (even though I don't use it for transfers on regular maps).

Hmm, I'm sure I spoke to her and Bo Johnson as well. not sure if I missed something though. I'll look around the town a bit more and see :)

Oh, the link you provided for the new file seems to be broken as well, so I can't download it.

Edit: Also forgot to say, that I think you should use the 'star' passability for the top roof tile. There was one particular location where It buged me a lot (picture below) since I was sure I could pass behind the building. If It's an auto-tile it might be a bit of work to fix it though.. it's all up to you :) Otherwise, maybe you could move the house 1 tile down so It's atleast possible to pass.
 
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ImmortalDreams

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The roof does use an auto tile. I don't think it's worth trying to fix that. I hope you don't mind. I did move the house down 1 tile, though, so that should make things a little smoother. I won't upload a demo with that change until I get some more feedback, though. I'm waiting for input from a couple people I know in person.
 

ImmortalDreams

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Since I'm still waiting for feedback, I went ahead and posted the updated demo after all. Version 2.4 has the tile fix mentioned in the previous post, as well as chapter checking. (I've already started working on chapter 2.)

If anyone would like to check it out, it's here.
 

Dalph

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Not bad at all, in fact it's pretty good for a first game, the storyline seems intriguing and the characters interesting enough.

I played it a bit until Lornly, but the door mistake that Dark pointed is still in the game, look:

(you pointed it Dark? I'm too lazy to read every post...lol)



Mapping is fine so far, especially in the interior, but it's a bit empty in some places (in the exterior), however it's something you can easily fix. Will play the rest tomorrow and make a full review.
 
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Bonkers

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Heya a few things I noticed while playing:

 

General:

Using heal drops out of the menu.  Normally it will allow for multiple uses or let me at least go back to the magic screen without dropping out of the menu back to the map.  Everything on the world map seems to be an island separated by rivers.  That's a jaunting.  None of these houses seem to have doors.  I understand the stars to make people know things are transitional or items, but no doors on the houses in a village, where they could always be open near dangerous wilderness is a bit strange.  Diagonal stairs take me in regular 4 dimensional movement.  If you like you can add in that type of movement as an event without 8 directional movement script from the base of the stairs or simply move the event to disallow entry at the bottom to discourage the use.  The level up messages and treasure taking up the entire width of the window seems too big.  A simple window would have been better. Learning a plot related skill or a special item would merit this sort of response.  The maps are very open with nowhere to go.

 

First Town:

There are barrels on the counter of the INN.  I didn't think that happened, even in Ireland.  I like how you say 'hello' to people first before the normal RPG conversations are initiated.  It makes it feel more natural that they are strangers, and to be polite.  Fancy mirror in old lady's house isn't properly tile set and lets me climb up it. The graveyard has odd clipping on the tile set and the stairs will not take me onto the platform with the graves to explore or read them.  There are graves on top of someone's house made of stone, when all the ones in the graveyard are wooden.  Also having the gravestones right on top of the house seems odd even for a gypsy.  Fancy mirror in the gypsy house also allows for wall climbing. I can climb the walls of the outside of the Inn on the vines.  There is no way to stay the night at the inn, so Kel cannot regain MP. I think that is kinda cheap.

 

Forest:

There is a transition in the forest left of a chest I wasn't expecting taking me to a ladder and another chest.  Can this be made more clear?  I cannot get the chest left of the ladder even reclimbing to the top.  Hi Ether from a chest, is actually a Hi-Potion.  I got all excited I could restore mp, and it can instead restore 1000 hp.  *tears baldness out.  I made it into a secret castle, exiting south allowing me to climb the walls of the tower to the left.  That allows me to go over the trees to the iron key.  I think this was intentional?  How do the characters know the castle was inhabited by vampires?  That seems like a jump logic considering the normally open graves.  I was away a very long time from Bo the guide.  He didn't seem to mind being left alone standing in the forest at all.  The Earth spirit comes along and without warning spoils the many potions I just used before saving.  Again I consider that rather cheap to have that sort of a surprise spoil any items I could have saved.  For just being annihilated they seem rather chipper with the unmasking of the illusion.  She just threatened the lady that handed me my rear on a silver platter and the lady fell for it?  That seems extremely implausible given how much stronger she was, with or without an illusion.  And she just leaves no argument. The explanation afterwards helped a little, but still that was rather rushed and confusing.

 

Castle City

For the map immediately right of the castle's entrance and the merchants you have 4 lamp posts huddled together to light such a small spot in the corner of a street. You put an e at the end of tomato.She has immortal ancestry specifically?  That doesn't help narrow it down as what type of non human for the moment. Lamp posts to the right of the palace are blocking traffic to the last door. On the merchant map entering the castle the blacksmith's bald head is cut at the very top when intersecting the "star" marked tile set counter. I don't see how just looking in someone's eyes could reveal they are a magical creature.

 

Mines: 

Innkeeper is one of the secret guard.  That is an extremely crafty and wonderful twist.  died horribly again only to have the girl flip out and decimate them.  I don't see the point of losing at all, when this can happen triggered in battle.

 

Demo is complete.  I'll be working on a formal review now of the material.

 

*EDIT:  I've nearly finished my review of the demo, aside from these observations and will PM you the review once it is completed for your approval.

 

 

 

 

.
 
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