RPG Maker Nutcase
- Feb 3, 2014
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"Rules are not necessarily sacred, principles are." - Franklin D. Roosevelt
Hello everyone I have once again crawled back into the "Game Ideas and Prototypes" thread to make a post about another game that may or not go into production or may just be very well stillborn.
But first some back story, which is handily accessible via this handy dandy spoiler.
Final Farcity was a game I had made during my commercial phase/era. It was a parody of the first Final Fantasy game where at the time I only knew the very beginning and end of said game so the game for its middle bits was an experiment in making an open world game in which the player could go get the Eight Elemental Crystals (Trademark) in any order with some being more difficult than others. The game has since been free to play for a while now, in fact you can still download and play it! Click on this sentence!
I hope you read the spoiler so here we go.
"I think we may be going a bridge too far." - Frederick Browning (prior to Operation Market Garden)
The game starts with the old song and dance routine from FFI to FFV, The King of a nation wants you to collect the four elemental crystals each guarded by a boss in four elementally themed dungeons. "Okay? Where's the parody?" you might be asking, well...
Once you have obtained all four crystals, they are presented to the king who is then revealed to be a closeted drug addict who then grinds up all four of the crystals and smokes them via a device known as a...broken light bulb. The crystals are then revealed through the king's stoned exposition that the elemental crystals are made of magically infused methamphetamine. Due to the amount of magic and meth in the four crystals that the king overdoses and dies. His chancellor (whom by the way, failed art school in Vienna) tells you though his thick German accent to find the King's estranged son. A dungeon or so later you find the prince who works as a 70's adult film star complete with Ron Jeremy moustache, who exclusively talks in sexual puns and innuendos. However for him to be coronated to be king, he needs his Magic Thong, which is kept in a techno/cyberpunk city.
The next section of the game makes fun of how Square Enix wants to do something like "Phantasy Star" or "Cyberpunk: 2077" but don't have the balls to do one so they rip off Top Gear in Final Fantasy XV and discover the joys of George Orwell's 1984 for Final Fantasy VII. So you go to a cyberpunk city with a large techno Sci-Fi dungeon where you fight Billy Idol for control of the city (and the Magic Thong).
Once Billy Idol is sent to the Shadow Realm and with the Magic Thong in tow, the Prince puts the thong on and accidentally summons a monster made up entirely of STDs which by the way is the final boss. Once the STD monster is defeated the game ends on the Prono Prince's coronation in which he flails about his royal scepter in front of his subjects. The credits roll.
Why Are You Gonna Make This Maybe?
"If today I stand here as a revolutionary, it is as a revolutionary against the Revolution." - A Bad Artist
So I've always wanted to make a smaller game. But I keep coming up with big RPGs with vast stories and sidequests but I never finish their development. Just look at the amount of games on my Gamejolt page that are stillborn in mid-development. But I wanted deep down to make a smaller game with a more comedic bend to it, a return to form to my early RPG Maker days back when I made self-insert "My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic" games that revolved around the state of Massachusetts for some reason. I want to make an RPG Maker game that is funny and takes the Norm Macdonald approach to Squenix JRPGs with a sprinkle of George Carlin commentary and Gary Larson absurdism. Also who wouldn't want to fight Billy Idol in turn based combat? I figured that one way of doing that is by making a sequel to something I have made."Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm." - Winston Churchill
Also some final notes:
- The quotes used in this thread are from the loading screen of "Hearts of Iron 4", my fav strategy game.
- I put way too much effort into this post.
- I think a Billy Idol cyberpunk boss fight would be cool.
- I have nothing against the Final Fantasy series, I think a majority of the games are really good but I think those who make the games make what are in my opinion, weird creative decisions.
- In case you haven't noticed I am a strange person on this site.