Hoo boy. Time to dig up some ancient, personal memories. Story time, kids.
So, the earliest screenname I remember having was
Celebi134. Can ya tell what game series I was obsessed with as a kid? This was on the first internet community I had ever been a part of, an old forum that an old website was connected to. That old site was called Super Mario HQ. I frequented a message board related to a webcomic there called Neglected Mario Characters. Turns out, that would become my AOL username back when.
The second screenname I used for a long time was
KintarosTiger. The younger me grew up into a teen, fell in love with the Mortal Kombat series, and named herself after an OC. As it were, the boss Kintaro from MK2 was originally going to be an anthropomorphic tiger, not the multi-armed, dragon-like Shokan he wound up being. Kintaros was a tiger-boy teenager with a ninja sword, vaguely inspired by Mitsurugi in Soul Calibur 3. I had a whole picture "series" in old sketchbooks that, if given time, I could probably regurgitate a lot of.
And now, we get auto-biographical. More than the last two paragraphs.
My word kinda got flipped upside down as a fledgling adult, having graduated high school. My oldest best friend went to college. My relationship with my family steadily declined, despite being stuck in their house. I lost my religion after being a zealot in my teens, only to rise again as a pagan. I knew I wasn't straight since my teens, but realizing I wasn't even
cis as an early twenty-something was a doozy. I didn't know how to handle things, but I think I knew this couldn't last forever.
In needing a new name to match a new identity, I lifted it off of an OC I created at the time. One of my first big RPG Maker ideas was a fantasy retelling of The Lion King. My keyfabe, my self-insert, my favorite OC, my beloved Raziya... wasn't always named Raziya. Back when I created her, she wasn't a martial-artsy pyromancer either. She was a lot more roguish. She was called
Rachel the Ravenous in her earliest incarnations. I still have the
dA picture as proof.
If I was to find my truth, I needed to search for it, no matter where it led. I wanted to be, and in many ways still am, a "spiritual seeker" on the winding road of self-discovery. Trying to understand a world that became more and more muddy, both as I delved and as things progressed by itself. Trying to find and truly grasp my place in it all, swept up in its currents or acting regardless of it all.
...so who else could I be today, but
Rachel The Seeker?