I keep forgetting online people way too fast

[Clord]

One of downsides of trying to friend me online is that I can easily forget a person I haven't actually seen.


Then they contact me like over year later or something and remember me, while I have no clue of actual details.


Also since my game debut on Steam, there has been so many free stuff and/or scam attempts directed at me over the chat. Me being a good natured fool of sometimes accepting friend requests etc from the strangers.

 

[Wavelength]

If you want to work on this weakness, then make notes about each person you interact with online.  Write down things that you learn about them.  Try to visualize what they might look like (and write that down too, if you want!  lol).  Keep it somewhere you can reference it easily if you meet that person online a year later - maybe a Word file or a notebook.

I've got a somewhat different problem - I remember who people are and I remember their names and lots of details about them, but I cannot ever remember their face!  Anyone except my family and closest friends, if I see them in the middle of a crowd or out of the context in which I know them (e.g. a professor in the context of college), I will never be able to recognize them!  I have been able to get a little better at this by mentally keeping a "record" of their eye color, hair color, a word to describe their face shape, etc. - this way if someone says "Hey, Jason!" I can narrow down who it might be that's in front of me.  But I still find it profoundly hard.

 

[Touchfuzzy]

I remember people by their avatar, as its sort of their "face". Then they change it and I no longer have any idea who they are.

That is why I rarely change mine, though I doubt anyone would forget me since I'm... kind of a big deal.

 

[Ms Littlefish]

I usually keep my avatar the same for that reason, too. Mostly so other people can remember me. Of course, here I am with Halloween stuff going on.

That said I'm a freak of nature memory wise and ya'll can't hide from me. I left my grocery store job almost a year ago and still know all the PLU produce codes. I know I am the exception, not the rule.

 

[Vox Novus]

I've got a somewhat different problem - I remember who people are and I remember their names and lots of details about them, but I cannot ever remember their face!  Anyone except my family and closest friends, if I see them in the middle of a crowd or out of the context in which I know them (e.g. a professor in the context of college), I will never be able to recognize them!  I have been able to get a little better at this by mentally keeping a "record" of their eye color, hair color, a word to describe their face shape, etc. - this way if someone says "Hey, Jason!" I can narrow down who it might be that's in front of me.  But I still find it profoundly hard.

Sounds almost like prosopagnosia although it seems you can remember your family memebers; still might be worth getting that checked out.

As for myself I have no such issue because I have a good memory, I can remember even small conversations with people online even years later, and I'll remember how we

met.

 

[Clord]

My thing is people centric.


I can memorize fictional characters and many other things just fine.


Heck I have memorized Hearthstone etc stuff easily by just playing and watching others playing it.


I remember things from decades ago.


I have very selective memory it seems.

 

[mjshi]

@Wavelength: My problem is the exact opposite of yours xD I can always remember a face that I've seen somewhere, but for the life of me I can't remember anyone's name unless I consciously tell myself to remember it, and even then I get names mixed up so often that I once, for a whole year, had called two people whose names started with the same three letters the wrong name (this name-swapping fiasco gets worse depending on how many similar letters there are and how recently I've known you). Online interactions are nice though, I can easily remember an avatar after seeing it a few times.

That said, I have a horrible time remembering the names of fictional characters, due to their lack of faces. I usually end up referring to them by prominent personality traits, occupation, or accomplishments (e.g. that not-nice girl who's the daughter of Ares in camp halfblood, what's her name?)

In visual media, things get even worse. Sometimes I can finish an entire season of anime, an entire series of manga, an entire trilogy of movies, without ever being able to recall the protagonist's name.

 

[Touchfuzzy]

I have a crazy memory for numbers. But names. ahahaha, ha, ha. I might remember a face and have a vague "I know this person from somewhere", but unless I hang out with someone a lot, that is it.

 

[Meike]

I'm bad with names and faces. Working in a pharmacy it gets embarrassing cause I'll see a customer waiting around and be like 'Can I help you?' and they're like 'I just talked to you two minutes ago, I'm waiting for a prescription.' Or, meeting a bunch of people I don't know over the past year cause I moved/got married and meeting them again it's like 'who are you? I don't recognize the face, but the story sounds familiar of how we met...what was your name?' I'm getting better but it's still crazy.

So if someone contacts you a year+ later, specially if they don't have the same username/avatar...if you weren't that close to them that'd be tough

 

[Clord]

To be honest, it has probably also to do with my lifestyle.


I'm not really one who actively seeks new friends and stuff like that. As my body ages, I'm becoming more and more someone who just likes to accept myself as I'm and stay away from conflicts.


I have kept myself sane over the decades with my sheer willpower.

 

[Ellie Jane]

I remember people by their avatar, as its sort of their "face". Then they change it and I no longer have any idea who they are.

That is why I rarely change mine, though I doubt anyone would forget me since I'm... kind of a big deal.

Even with somebody Important, a change of avatars can mentally change their personality, it's like handwriting or hair dye.

 

[wizewun1]

I'm the opposite. I remember them all. < _ >

 

[Probotector 200X]

Even with somebody Important, a change of avatars can mentally change their personality, it's like handwriting or hair dye.

I think an avatar is a reflection of a person, in some ways. An avatar is basically a face. And it's a face we have complete and total control over, instead of being stuck with something we are born with, ha ha ha...

But still, even when people change avatars, it's easier for me to remember who they are than on sites where people have no avatars. It feels so...lonely at those places sometimes.

I try to be consistent. On most sites I tend to keep the same avatar. I've had this one since I joined, but it matches my username so it would feel wrong to change it. BUT, I tend to use a different name and avatar on different sites so no one would recognize me across other websites. Not sure why I do that though. I've never really contributed anything RPG Maker wise, so there's less point. (except a few XP sprites of video game characters, wow)

 

[Mage Heart]

I like to keep my avatar the same most of the times. I want to use an awesome female character as my avatar, but people always assume I am female.

 

[lPaladinl]

I remember people by their avatar, as its sort of their "face". Then they change it and I no longer have any idea who they are.

That is why I rarely change mine, though I doubt anyone would forget me since I'm... kind of a big deal.

Who the hell are you?



On a more serious note, I'm not sure what really to say about remembering people online. I usually remember people by their Avatar, and I tend to keep my friend lists more small and maintained (So I am more likely to actually have spoken to and recognise who I add). Usually if someone changes an Avatar or Name, I'll also have no idea who they are either, but I try to look into their history and see if I can see what they changed their name from or if they posted somewhere and if I remember who it was that made those posts. (For instance, on Steam, which is what I mostly use for any chatting, a Steam Profile shows the previous few names someone went by, but that's because anyone can change their name at anytime to anything.)

Not really the best way to figure it out but It's probably the only way I know how to do it.

Or in the worst case scenario where I have no idea who they are anymore, it doesn't hurt to just ask. 

 

[Celianna]

I abuse the note feature in League of Legends a lot, because otherwise I forget about them super fast.


I frequently forget about members here too, especially when I warn someone. I can warn someone like 3 times in a row, and still not remember them. This is why I'm always bewildered when someone complains I'm biased against them, when I can hardly remember who they are


And just like Touch, I mostly remember people through avatars. This is also the reason why I won't change mine, because I know a ton of people recognize me simply due to my avatar.

 

[Misaki]

I abuse the note feature in League of Legends a lot, because otherwise I forget about them super fast.

The League of Legends note feature is a miracle.

I usually stick to a small group of internet-friends, and for 3 years we still remember each other.

Then there's that moment when you know you should remember someone but you don't recognize the way they talk.

 

[Ruby]

I tend to remember people super easily. By names, avatars, etc. 

Some people more easily than others.

I think I'm remembered simply because of my username. 

 

[DarknessFalls]

are online people really people? what if....we are......the.....matrix

 

[SpaceBot]

Meh, I think it's fine. 
I pretty much make no attempt to make friends anymore. I used to be extremely outgoing, would talk to everyone, and was a bubbly happy person. Things happen, things change. You can't rely on most people anyways, so I am sure it isn't a great catastrophe if you don't remember people after a year. 
I'd also be super cautious if I had spam attempts and what not. 
Plus, I am a pretty firm believer that real friends don't take a year to talk to you, and would be active people in your life. :b 
Just me though.