Plot and Character Feedback

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Lunarea, Mar 4, 2012.

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  1. RubbyDukky

    RubbyDukky One of Rem's Many Husbands Veteran

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    In this spoiler is a small summary of the story for the project I'm working on:

    Kaito, a high school graduate in Japan, decides to visit his hometown after ten years. He visits a beautiful garden full of cherry trees where he used to play with a young girl around his age. This girl, Chisato, was Kaito's only friend, as was Kaito to Chisato. Kaito would often visit her after school, and Chisato would climb through a hole in the wall that connected the garden to her house. When they met, they would play hide-and-seek and bring magazines to read. They would play word games, hollering out to the sky if one of them won... They were friends that only had each other, and so their bond was precious. However, as fate would have it, a terrible accident occurred to destroy it as they were playing hide-and-seek.


    A man's cigarette landed on the side of the garden after being thrown halfheartedly, catching fire to the dried leaves and sticks next to the road. The fire quickly spread until Kaito finally noticed it from his hiding place near the front. He ran out before the fire could engulf the entire entrance and tried to get help. He shook a man's arm, screamed at a woman's figure, telling them that Chisato was still inside the garden. But no one wanted to jump through fire just to help a girl they didn't know. Kaito could only hope that his friend had gotten out through the hole that she came in from, but when the firemen rushed in to clear the fire, they found Chisato crushed under a fallen cherry tree. She died in the garden, her body too frail to endure the pressure of the trunk. Soon after, Kaito moved away, and he never saw the garden again. Until ten years later...


    As Kaito walks into the restored garden, he takes in the smell. He feels the smooth wind with his skin, but it doesn't feel the same. Nostalgia does not reach him from the past, and somehow, he feels no connection with the garden anymore. As he walks down the path around the center pond, he stops before a growing cherry tree. Under the branches and petals of the beautiful work of nature rests a polished stone plate. It reads "Sakata Chisato". As Kaito tries to remember how the girl looked back then - what she wore, he starts to piece together his memories of her. Strangely, it feels as though he is being helped by something, as though he is receiving memories that aren't his own.


    Suddenly, he feels a light tap on his shoulder and turns around, a little disoriented. As the image of the eight year-old girl surfaces in his mind, it merges with the tiny figure now in front of him. A transparent Chisato looks up at him, smiling cheerfully.


    "Hello, Kaito!" she exclaims excitedly.


    "...Huh?..." Kaito backs up a litte.


    "Hi!" The girl continues.


    "Um... Hi...?" He replies, unsure of his place in the world.


    "You are Kaito, right?"


    Kaito decides that she just looks like Chisato and regains his composure, "Uh, yeah. How can I help you?"


    "I want to show you something!" The girl says, grabbing Kaito's hand suddenly.


    "Wait- what?!" Kaito protests, but allowing himself to be pulled.


    "Over here!"


    She takes Kaito to the pond and they walk onto a small boardwalk from the side.


    "Hey, what are you doing?" Kaito asks.


    "You'll see in a second!" The girl replies.


    She stops on the edge of the boardwalk.


    "Okay, now what?"


    "Kaito, do you remember me?" She asks.


    "Remember- what are you..."


    "Do you remember me?" She asks again, this time in a flatter tone.


    "...Are you... actually Chisato?" Kaito responds slowly.


    "You remembered me!" She cheered, and pushed Kaito into the pond. As he hit the surface, he thought, "Chisato is a... ghost...?" before he blanked.


    When he comes to, Kaito is on the side of the pond, but the landscape around him has changed slightly. The pathway that looped around them is a deeper brown, and the pink trees around them seem to have switched places. Chisato kneels beside Kaito.


    "Welcome to my dream world!" she says excitedly.


    "W-what?..." Kaito mumbles, still dizzy from waking up, "What- what did you just do?"


    "What? I brought you to my dream world." Chisato replies, as if it were obvious.


    "Dream world?"


    "Yes! Sorry for asking like this, but can you do me a big favor?"


    Perplexed, Kaito nods non-coherently and says, "Sure...?"


    "Can you help me be reborn?"


    And so Kaito embarks on an adventure to help his childhood friend be reborn in order to pay back all that he owed. Little did he know the horrors and monsters he faced, as well as the retribution of a sinner...
     
  2. Omnilore

    Omnilore Villager Member

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    Okay, so previously I posted a comedic take on an RPG, but have since scrapped that idea. I'm going with the story I mentioned previously, and here's a new video with these characters, a little time travel, and some back and forth. It's still very early but I'm working on fleshing out the characters and have the overall plot already planned out.
     
  3. leomilhouse

    leomilhouse Warper Member

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    First off, you just cited my 2 favourite series ever, WoT and DW, so cheers to you. Secondly, excellent argument again, and it's one of the things that really draws me into the WoT world, it's the best of escapism as even the language seems foreign although it's just English. Another master stroke from RJ
     
  4. TrueUndeadHero

    TrueUndeadHero Villager Member

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    TITANS SAGA


    "An Idea In The Making"




    It is told, by the forefathers, that there was once a great struggle that man faced. Before the light rose in the sky and man could build cities, there existed the beings known as "Deities". These Deities were twelve giants that oppressed the humans with their strength and power, the world bending to their will and their might. Amongst humans existed the fearsome warrior army of the Deities known as "The Titans", huge human-like demi-Deities that did the bidding of their fathers and mothers to destroy all that mankind did to displease the Deities. Armed with magical weapons and near-indestructable armors made of legendary Godran Steel. It was written that in this time, mankind could not walk without fear of angering the Deities.


    Then, a warrior of man named Grand Ileric dared to disobey the Deities and, in his efforts, he stole one of their most fearful possessions. The gift, known as "The Gift of the Gods", became known as magic and imbued the humans with God-like abilities. With this new weapon, a war raged and the eventually the Deities fell to the human's will. Their defeat marked the end of tyranny for man, and the Deities were locked away in a prison known as "The Lightfall". To prevent anyone from discovering this place, it's location was removed by the followers of Grand Ileric from all writing and maps. With the death of Grand Ileric, came the Dawn of Man and the worship of him as a Savior.


    The Titans, scared of their lives after the war, hide in the temples of their gods and did their best to hide them from the prying eye. Trapping themselves inside, they entered the "Great Sleep" and turned themselves to stone and left their safety in the hands of their loyalist followers.


     


    ---




    Lyra, known as the 'The Land of the First Kings', is in turmoil as a new king rises to the throne. War is on the horizon as the Empire of Kez begins it's march over the sundered lands and the warriors and mages attempt to hold the lines. Morale is low since the death of King Oswyn II at the Battle of Giant's Step, and the kingdom seems all but saved...


    It is here we begin our story. In a small camp, far from the fields of battle as a young treasure seeker and mercenary named Reinier begins his first expedition into the lost Temple of Petra, the matron god of the Earth. Their mission is simple, retrieve the Godran Steel Weapon of Tetra, the Titan daughter of Petra known as "Caliburn", the sword of the earth shakers. Their mission becomes dangerous when the temple traps activate and awaken the Titan from her sleep, they attempt to escape but the Titan acquire them and quickly end their lives. She then turns to Reinier, questioning why he hasn't run and ask him to surrender to her or die...


    ...


     


    I'm going to be perfectly honestly, I am still working on the story here at this point.


    But the general idea is to show that as the adventure unfolds, so do many myths. Myths that the gods may not have been so evil, that magic may have had a different origin, and that the Grand Ileric may not have done what he claimed. An adventure that not only saves the kingdom from destruction, but also shows that maybe the Gods are needed despite what people claim is right and wrong...


    Please give me your opinion and share some ideas you think could happen in the story. I am happy to hear other great story ideas from other people.


    :D  - TRUEUNDEADHERO
     
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  5. chungsie

    chungsie Veteran Veteran

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  6. Shaz

    Shaz Veteran Veteran

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  7. chungsie

    chungsie Veteran Veteran

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    sorry shaz. I get confused with forums these days -.-
     
  8. chungsie

    chungsie Veteran Veteran

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    Hi folks. Sorry I posted in the wrong section/thread last time. I am still exhausted from the weekend, and I need my medicine tomorrow :p


    So I am starting a game, that I want to be story rich, and be something created from scratch. I apologize, as my inspirations are more personal, although there are metaphorical and satirical references to RW things, but that may be inappropriate for public discussion on these forums. I started by thinking of some races, and then described them all, about 34-36 of them. They are all unique in their own right. Not all of them have much information on history however, as they are not really known by scholars without speculation.


    I hope I do spoilers proper :(  I can't find BB option for that, or even the button to have option for spoiler.


    The inspiration is from things I have written, although some were published, they remain undiscovered. I have heard that they should be known because the writings I show people they really enjoy consuming :)  but you know, fame is more important than talent for sales lol

    The Abbreviated Histories of the Races of Eloha:



    Kowa:



    Pre History: Few Ruins remain of these people from before recorded history, mostly because of natural disasters. Most historians look to their religious sources to show that the destruction of the buildings at that time were due to Deitic Battles among their Pantheons.


    Before the great coming of the lands, they were a sparsely populated peoples, with very organic tools. It is traditionally taught in their schools that the Kowa ancients were mostly farmers, which is the main reason they hoard the most secrets of farming in the world, and such rich history for the profession.


    First Age:


    This was a time of great change for the Kowa. Their Shamans had taken on vows as Monks to a newly adopted religion, a religion from an ancient race that did not survive passed pre-history. It was also before medicine, and so their Orgies caused many illness and disease throughout the Kowa world.


    The first succession of rulers over the Kowa were known as Cataphrin, they were self appointed through divine right, as having had achieved great and impossible deeds to obtain their power. Some had even achieved god like status. The most infamous ruler among them was Valitrex I, whom was a benevolent ruler that wanted to end the practice of mass orgies. However the elders did not agree with this, and the monks paid assassins of the Nijo to have him murdered by means of poisonous fruits. However, when they went to wake him and later announce his death to the public, his body was never found. Some speculate that he had ascended to the realms of Bodia where he learned immortality and plots his vengeance against the Kowa traitors. Yet when those whom had betrayed died peacefully, they began accusing the Nijo of having stolen the body, and thus began the many plots to overthrow the Nijo from their homelands.


    It was for the most part, a time of darkness for intellectualism and free thought. Everyone lived in fear of torture for speaking against the Monks or Elders. A secret society did begin works for laying the foundation for the education systems in Kowan society. By holding seminars and classes in the catacombs of the town of Neri. Some politicians knew of the outlawed practices and members of the society, but refrained from taking legal recourse against them. And the Society of Enlightenment remains a strong influence well into modernity, as having members of Universities and Private Institutions for learning.


    Second Age:


    This was a time of poverty for everyone, as a strong winter threatened crop harvests. So they made agreements with the High Elves for resources they could sustain themselves, of which included a Military Pact. Most the agreements were promises that the Kowa would oust the Nijo fro Rah and transfer any and all wealth to the High Elves, in exchange for assistance through the harsh and prolonged winter.


    In the fall of the fifteenth year of the Time of Bostrin, the Kowan military assembled in great numbers on the border of Dor and Rah. The campaign was a means to spread wealth to the people, and so military service for everyone of age was mandatory at the time. They promised to pay them well with the goods recieved from the High Elves in the exchange of wealth from the Nijon governments and settlements.


    A great many battles took place, some with death rates as high as 95% for both sides. The problem with a gridlocked line of battle came to the attention of a Black Smith that was experimenting with a new Weapon form. Traditionally up until her assistance, the Kowa had relied on short spears and bows to engage in combat and hunting with. While they were effective hunting tools, they were poor against the more advanced armors and weapons of the Nijo. She presented her new technology to the Cataphrin, and it was adopted after testings proved it was indeed superior for their cause.


    Maces became the standard armament for the military thereafter. And soon they were making headway into the lands of Rah. However, it was when they had began blockading the capital that they could not starve out the Nijo inhabitants, and so there siege tactics had failed them. The Cataphrin and the Supreme General Noshua approached the High Elves asking for assistance in their siege.


    The agreed terms were that the High Elves would bring in their High Dracs in exchange for the new technologies of the Kowa. However, the Noshua did not like the terms. And so after a successful defeat of the Capital, Noshua turned the campaing for home and began to hunt down the Cataphrin, something believed to be impossible. The Wood Elves took claim over the lands of Rah and routed the High Elf occupational forces, and freed the captive Nijo and escorted them into the lands of Aex via caves and mountain passes.


    Three years after the Dor-Rah war, the Cataphrin was executed publicly, and the Supreme General was made King, thus ending the time of the Cataphrin government. The Elders were dissolved and the Monks went into hiding. During the reign of Noshua, the Society of Enlightenment was made legal, and given official funding. The High Elves for a time held resentment to the Kowa, but Noshua sent emissaries offering their newly founded official education systems. The High Elves refused the offer believing the Kowa would want more from them, and so they maintained open trade, but ended the Military Pacts for a time.


    It was not until Noshua's successor Xia the Great that terms returned to normal with the High Elves, through assisting the High Elves in an unsuccessful Campaign against the Wood Elves.


    Third Age:


    With the declarations of education in Kowan establishments, many great thinkers and inventors emerged. Philosophers established the basis of science, and Medicine was born. Many claim that Zushul of Neri founded the first clinics in the areas nearest the lands of Zin, in an attempt to offer aid to the High Elves without military assistance.


    Under King Darius, a seventh generation removed from Noshua, Clinics and Military hospitals were built throughout all of Dor. They also began allowing non Kowans to take up residence within the lands, as official decree by the king.


    King Darius feared so much that a harsh winter would return to their lands, so he established insulated Food Storage and greenhouses powered by natural thermals near the city of Bosh.


    The Swarfo began to take refuge in secret within Neri, against the pacts with the High Elves. Fearful of discovery and retaliation, Darius had them enlisted into the armies, as a forced promissory to protect Dor from any invasion retaliation. While they proved more able than the Mace wielding soldiers of the Kowa in combat, they refused the Kowan traditional education system, and so they remain somewhat regarded as dumb. However, King Darius personally appointed a Swarfo as a military Adviser.


    Modernity:


    Today things are uncertain, there is talk of ending High Elf and Kowan relations, in favor for alligning with the more charitable and wealthy Khimra. Not much has changed otherwise. They have recently allowed the Zorgis into their realm on the promise of enslaving the Electric Myr for use in technological discovery.
     
  9. Kes

    Kes Global Moderators Global Mod

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    I'll merge this with Plot and Character feedback.  Just FYI, General Discussion is never about feedback for individual, specific games, it is meant to be more wide-ranging than that, discussing things which are applicable to many games.
     
  10. Arithmetician

    Arithmetician Veteran Veteran

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    So I'm trying to develop my plot and character ideas a bit more.  The main idea of the game was coming up with an RPG in the style of games like Final Fantasy V   (e.g. a job system with 14 jobs, 8 of which are accessible to each character),  but like that game developing an actual plot was of secondary concern to me at first.  What I really know is that I don't want to copy FFV's plot wholesale (though a nod here and there would be fine).


    I have worked out the party of playable characters, and I'm trying to work out the details of exactly how they should meet.


    I have the protagonist, a studious young man who is a bit introverted but loyal to those he cares for.


    I have the princess, who besides having access to traditional jobs for the supporting heroine like Cleric, starts with the Rogue job (for sneaking out of the castle).


    I have the tsundere, who is fiercely independent and quick to anger, but with a gentler side as well.  


    And I have the wanderer, whose knowledge of the world comes from experience rather than books.


    I was thinking that the protagonist could be dispatched to investigate some sort of disturbance, possibly on behalf of the mage school he studies at.  Maybe the princess could set of on her own to investigate as well (though admittedly, Princess Lenna snuck out of the castle in FFV to check on the crystals, so that would be a similar plot point).  Well, if I had to come up with why the others are involved, the wanderer feels drawn there, and the tsundere... maybe she's a local impulsively carrying out her own investigation, or otherwise a rebel who ends up throwing her lot with them.


    Well, I have to go now.  I still need to figure out what the disturbance is (shouldn't be crystals breaking, since that would be plagiarism), and who's the villain in the first place.  Coming up names would be good too.
     
  11. Malevolence149

    Malevolence149 Villager Member

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    I'd really like to find someone - or a few people - to bounce around ideas with about...

    Title: 


    Sleeper's Saga or Succession


    Description:


    With a military coup threatening the kingdom, the lives of four individuals intertwine to find that everything going on around them is but a small piece of a much much larger game.

    • Through betrayal, a Commander learns who and what he must truly fight for.
    • Through devotion and circumstance, a Priest begins to unravel the real power of the Light.
    • Through contrition, a Vagabond searches for a way to save a dying city.
    • Through atonement, an enemy - turned ally - must find a way to save the kingdom and its people.

    These four individuals come together fairly early in the story. (The player will play through each minor-story though.) And when they're finally one party, they...

    Go to the kingdom - fighting through soldiers of the military coup - and find the King performing a ritual with a purported traitor to the kingdom in the throne room. When the ritual has been completed, the traitor is whisked away to the Land of Light. The main party attempts to get there through other means, going off of something the Commander encountered in Ethul. When they enter what they believe is the Land of Light, they fight through a menagerie of nightmares. It is revealed that they were in the dream of the ruler of the Land of Light, and as the ruler wakes the party is transported/manifested into the ruler's realm where the traitor reveals itself to be the ruler of the Land of Nightmares, who is normally forbidden and hindered from entering the Land of Light


    The Dark ruler tries to kill the Light ruler in its sleep and fails. However, succeeding enough to injure and wake the Light ruler. After the Light ruler forces the Dark ruler into their realm, the party is told that they must go into the Dark ruler's realm and stop them because the Nightmare/Darkness is seeping into the party's world. The injuries sustained in the Light ruler's sleep were enough to dampen the power that seals the Dark ruler's world.


    After finding a way to access the Dark ruler's realm through objects in the party's world, they proceed to enter the realm of Nightmares and defeat the Dark ruler. However, because balance must be maintained across these realms, the party must defeat the Light ruler too because the Nightmare will be - and is starting to be - reborn in the Light ruler.


    After the Light ruler is defeated...



    Spoiler



    Everyone will split to finish their respective stories. However, the player may only choose 1 story to follow to its end, which ultimately leads whoever they chose on a journey to an ancient shrine (1 party member now). They fight their way through mild enemies, and after defeating 'The Avatar of Creation', 'The Avatar', or just 'The Shadow of the World Weaver', the character is transferred to a very pure place with a few "World Shrines". The game ends with something like:


    Female Voice: 'Ah...the first of my champions. I can't wait for the others to arrive.'


    Character: 'Who are you? What is this place?'


    Female Voice: 'All questions will be answered in time, but consider all your experiences up to now a test. A test to see if you're fit for the trials ahead - fit to be...my successor.'


    Character: 'What does that mean?!?!'


    Female Voice: 'Shhh, my child. The others are coming...'


    Game End


    (Obviously this is a set up for future games that won't overly limit the creative freedom of whatever is produced because they are 'test worlds'. And anything can be on a test XD. Or the game could just end like that and leave the player like...'Dafuq just happened....')






    Alright, so whatever tier of spoiler you went to, I'd appreciate it if you gave me your feedback. Does it make sense? Is it too much? Is there a way to make it more cohesive and linear (or non-linear)?
    Also, it might be better to message me personally because I have a good chunk of the story. I just didn't think it was necessary to put ALL of it here. Thank you in advance!
     
  12. Vandriette

    Vandriette Dark King Veteran

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     I'm trying to avoid any spoilers regarding my game, but I was wondering what people thought of my demo's main attraction


    EDIT: This is for a horror game(Rosary Of The Reaper)


    RTM.jpg
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 19, 2016
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  13. HexMozart88

    HexMozart88 The Master of Random Garbage Veteran

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    Amazing! I love the hair and the eyes. Though I'm not exactly sure what her knees are doing. Or her arms. But it looks very nice, aside from that. It has a nice painter's touch, especially the hair. 
     
  14. PsychicToaster

    PsychicToaster Best Clairvoyant Appliance 2018 Veteran

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    Hello! I would like to preface this by saying that I adore the idea of a narrative that can played from different character perspectives, and followed to conclusion on subsequent playthroughs. It adds instant replayability to your game and keeps it fresh. Four different ways to play through, provided the quest is indeed dramatically different each time, is pretty awesome. Many props to you on that. 

    My real concern doesn't come from your narrative, which sounds solid enough based on the limited information available, but from the naming scheme you've chosen. Call me picky, but Land of Light and Land of Nightmares just sound slightly corny to me. If it's a stylistic choice that works for you, well then that's fair enough, but some interesting names might make these transdimensional worlds sound more awesome and important. Maybe Land of Light can be named something similar, without sounding like something from a standard fare fantasy novel that didn't sell too well. Maybe Lightshore? I don't know. Throw around some names and see what else might work for it, some things that roll off the tongue. I don't want to act like I'm part of some Committee On RPG Naming Elements or something, but maybe it's bugging me because the rest of the story sounds pretty good compared to these commonplace names. 

    I must also ask some questions:


    1.Why is there a military coup? Who is responsible for it? Will that thread of the story be resolved prior to being beamed off to the other worlds, or is it just sort of left hanging?


    2.Why do these other worlds exist, and who are the two Rulers? Are these deities of some sort?


    3.Why has this started happening now, of all times, and how did the traitor learn of the ritual he casts? How did he get into the character's world to begin with if he's normally the Dark Ruler?


    4.Why is the Light Ruler asleep? 


    5.Is leaving the player with one party member not going to make balancing the game absolutely obnoxious? I would honestly recommend at least allowing the player to pick up some new companions along the way or something. Maybe some hirelings you can customize a-la Pillars of Eternity/Baldur's Gate.


    Solid start, but I think we need a few answers to flesh out and give some context to your world here. All in all, it sounds like you've given thought to personalities for your heroes and hopefully some unique opportunities to explore them further through their stories. Keep in mind that the player should learn more about each one before picking a storyline to follow, so that it might influence his or her decision, as well as making the characters the player didn't pick still feel important and memorable.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 19, 2016
  15. Arithmetician

    Arithmetician Veteran Veteran

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    @Akumai  The eyes make her look like she's in a trance, and that shadow over them is commonly used to indicate a yandere mood.  The flame-like motif around the voluminous red hair reminds me of Akiha's "Caging Hair" from Tsukihime, demonic hair that would incinerate and steal the life-force from those it ensnared.  And then of course, you have some fan service with her outfit.  


    @Malevolence149  I'm sure you're aware of this, but splitting off into four story branches, one for each of the player characters, creates an immense amount of work.  How long is each of these branches supposed to be?
     
  16. Vandriette

    Vandriette Dark King Veteran

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    Note: Heavy gore in this photo, but it should give you an understanding of the character, atleast a little. Note2: Done by a different artist then the other images

    FB27E54FA74F5F29B0ECED3E014644B4F0DCFBEAA941D53A4Fpimgpsh_fullsize_distr.png



    EDIT: What I can say, without spoiling, is that it's not a yandere related phenomena, but rather, as you guessed, has something to do with a "trance"
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 19, 2016
  17. Malevolence149

    Malevolence149 Villager Member

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    @Arithmetician The branches aren't terribly long because everything should happen - or appear to happen - over the course of around 3 days or so. The initial branches that lead into the main story branch don't seem like they'll pose too much trouble. It's a fairly amazing mess of a linear hodgepodge. However, the real problem is the end-game as @PsychicToaster mentioned in ( 5. ). I already had a few workarounds for it, but I want something that makes sense in relation to the world-building and game-feel. I want something that "feels" right, and I think I'm halfway there because a lot of my thoughts "felt" wrong. XD
     
  18. Vandriette

    Vandriette Dark King Veteran

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    Sen has always been one of my favorite characters in my game~

    Sen.png
     
  19. Arithmetician

    Arithmetician Veteran Veteran

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    So, on the other thread (October) progress, @Schlangan suggested some possible names for an antagonistic character.  Among those that stood out to me were Nostradeus and Theodore.  The former can be read as Latin for "our god" while the latter is Greek for "god's gift".  Both seem fitting for a villain filled with hubris.   But at the same time, they suggest rather different approaches to villainy.  


    Nostradeus seems the more obviously evil type of villain, and the fact that the name sounds similar to Nostradamus adds to this.  It suggests the type of villain who is actively trying to bring about the end of the world or unleash apocalyptic forces, possibly driven by prophecy and the powers of darkness.


    In constrast, the name Theodore doesn't sound as villainous at first.  It's easy to see himself as some sort of "chosen one", or an ally at first.  But light is not necessary good, and his pride could be his undoing.  Moreso than a Nostradeus, he may be of a "the ends justify the means" sort, or having vaguely sympathetic motives.  Of course, al of this could be a front.


    The only question is which one do I use?  Or perhaps they are but two sides of the same coin.
     
  20. Kes

    Kes Global Moderators Global Mod

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    @Akumai This is not an art thread. If you want to show your characters you can do so in the Art and Literature thread. If you want feedback, there are a couple of places in the Resources section, either in the WIP thread or you can start your own thread in Resources Support.
     
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